It is inevitable for a professional Dominatrix to get “timewasters”. These are the people who phone/email/text and book time with no intentions of showing up at all. Last night I was asked how I manage such people and had a discussion on my process of elimination. Just this morning, a menial did not show up for the time he had requested and booked, this in turn prompted some thoughts on writing.
So, this post is mainly for the benefit of the other professionals out there (or Tops who are considering turning professional) but it can also be an explanation for the menials who intend to book time and find the Mistress less than forthcoming straight away.
You can often tell, with a little experience on such matters, who are serious and who are not. Here are a few tips:
- Blocked numbers: While sometimes a blocked number proves to be genuine, most are not. I tend to treat blocked numbers as pot luck. I take the request very lightly and often do not even bother writing the booking into my diary. If they end up walking through my dungeon doors it is then a pleasant surprise. I then tell them not to block their number in future (as a professional, personal details of anyone visiting my realm are kept strictly confidential). I then use this as an easy excuse to punish the menial as soon as they arrive.
- iPhone records: In this day and age of technology, keeping records is easier than ever. When a booking is requested, accepted and a phone number has been made available, I place the date, time, name given (as they are often slave names and not birth names), and phone number of the caller into my calendar. Two alarms are placed, one fifteen minutes before their allotted time and one dead on when the booking is supposed to take place (arriving any time after the second alarm is reason for punishment), if the menial does not arrive at all, I place their name and number in my phone contact list under “Time wasters”. If the number ever calls me again, it shows on my phone as being in this category and I know it is someone who has been a disappointment in the past. I give only a single chance. Once on my list, the menial is denied any further requests.
- Recurring messages: If a booking has been made and the menial messages you constantly asking for you to describe in detail what you intend to do with them when they arrive, chances are they have no intention of arriving at all and instead get their jollies from reading any explicit texts you send them. Too much information before the allotted time can ruin a majority of the surprise and effect. If they are serious, they will accept your answer of “no” and will experience when they arrive.
- Time away from the dungeon: Requests are often made for home visits. In cases such as this, PayPal is your friend. Demand a deposit to cover travel expenses in excess. Either by post or by PayPal. This way, costs are covered in the case of a no-show or hoax call. Travel should not be considered unless this criteria is met.
- Love you long time: Any booking made over two weeks in advance are likely not to show, treat these as you would a blocked number, eg: with a pinch of salt.
- Wads of cash: anyone offering you large amounts of money to do things you would not normally do or things that are too outlandish are almost certainly time wasters. Black list them and forget about them. If you do decide to give them a chance and they do actually show up, make sure tribute is seen in advance, or they will make an excuse like “I have left it in the car” after they have experienced their little trip to see you before disappearing and never being seen again (literally just seeing you is often enough to cause them to ejaculate in their pants. Make sure you are wearing a long coat or something similar when answering the door to make sure these annoying little menials get the minimum satisfaction possible).
- Too much detail: If the menial spends ten minutes or more on the phone, explaining to you in great detail his fetishes and desires, he is an unlikely candidate to show face. If he continues after you have politely told him that he can explain it on the day when his time is booked, hang up. You can hear it all on the day of his allotted time (if he shows up).
These are just a few tips (nothing is set in stone, I am sure other Domme have their own techniques. These are simply my own). No doubt I will include more at a later date but for the time being, these are enough reading material for a single post.
To all the Tops who are thinking of turning professional: I hope these help.
To all the bottoms who are wondering why they are suddenly being ignored by a Mistress/Master: check the above list and ask yourself if you have been less than genuine.
On a final and additional note: If a menial phones to cancel an allotted time (no matter the reason), he/she is exempt from being black listed.