Introductions: Phobos & Deimos

A little under two weeks ago, Benjamin and I visited the Birmingham Bizarre Bazaar and every time we visit; a look over a particular trade stand is mandatory: Jack’s Floggers.

Obviously, my collection of toys is quite vast. I have many. But, it should come as no surprise that the named items in my collection of BDSM weaponry are the items which are not only my favourites and have incredible sentimental value, but that which are also crafted to the insanely high quality which meet my exacting standards. My named items are actually quite few in number (comparatively speaking).

Jack’s Floggers created the majority of my named toys: Sasha & Tempest, Scylla & Charybdis, Pooky and now also Phobos and Deimos. He is possibly my favourite designer and creator of impact play toys.

In fact, the only named toy that I currently own that he has not created is Angele (which was originally created in 1933 by Vitalis and fully restored by Lisa from Bound2Tease.net).

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Phobos and Deimos are the latest additions to my arsenal of named beauties. Lovingly purchased for me by my Benjamin while mandatorily visiting Jack’s trade stand.

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Normally I have my custom items designed from Dymondwood, this set has handles which have been created from my second favoured choice: African Blackwood. The reason for such is because they were not originally custom designed for me, I simply fell in love with them upon sight.

Phobos and Deimos are what I normally refer to as ‘detached’ floggers. Which means that the falls are detached from the handle by a short length (in this case, a 3 inch detachment of platted leather followed by 16 inches of soft but heavy, full suede falls).

Named after the mythological twin offspring of the Greek god or war (Ares) and the Greek goddess of beauty (Aphrodite), Phobos (fear) and Deimos (dread) were said to accompany their father into battle (for my geeky readers: the two moons of Mars bear the same namesake).

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They pack quite a lovely thud. I am still applying treatments of moisturising cream to Benjamin‘s back to sooth the impact dehydration from that evening of public floggings (though I will admit that he received quite a lot of punishment that night).

Without a doubt: Worthy of their names. Thankyou my sweet Benjamin. I love them.

Equinelibrium.

Equinelibrium:

English (sort of… Ok, so I made it up).

Etymology:

From Latin equīnus (“of or pertaining to horses”) + lībra (“balance”).

Noun:

equinelibrium (plural equinelibriums or equinelibria)

  1. The psychological balance of a human, usually submissive, who has taken the role of a pony during ponyplay activities; this typically includes wearing tack such as a bridle and bit. Also known as ponyspace or pony headspace.

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Every now and then, I have a ponyplay session down in Kent at the DV8 Leisure center. I always make full use of the 53 acres of private and secluded woodland, and in the warm summer months; it is simply a beautiful place for outdoor BDSM activities.

Now that the sunshine is once again coming out to play, I will admit that; while I may not like the intense light, I am gleefully looking forward to more sunshine fueled ponyplay days.

In the June of last year I managed to get some wonderful photos of some outdoors ponyplay with a human pony that I named Earl Grey (love of tea methinks?), I think they are lovely photos and deserve to be seen, but he has been a little timid about his photos being placed on show and naturally I have been respecting his wishes and keeping them private. A recent email conversation with him has opened permissions to place a couple on my blog. So, a big “thank you” to Earl Grey for the photo use permissions. A blog post introducing ponyplay has been long overdue.

The day consisted of many different activities, from Dressage to Carriage riding. But the two photos you see below are simply images of me “breaking him in” and working a sweat up on him.

The whip was purely an incentive for him to keep moving and never actually struck his body. You would be surprised at how fast people can run when they hear the crack of a Longeing Whip a few inches behind their head.

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If I get the chance this year, I am thinking of a picnic basket filled with French cheeses, bread and a rich red wine; to enjoy after working (to the point of exhaustion) whatever beast(s) of burden are with me.

Oh, and more photos. Definitely more photos.

Photos used with permission.
All images are Copyright © 2012 AemiliaHawk. All Rights Reserved.

A day in the life

Just over a month ago, I was visited by a bondage enthusiast for a full day professional session. Entering my dungeon as soon as it was opened and spending the entire day with me, whatever that day might hold, until I closed and locked the doors in the evening.

It is rare that I get a visitor for an entire day. Needless to say, I rather enjoy it.

For the majority of the time he spent in my care, when I was not personally playing and seductively teasing him, he was restrained to my St Andrews cross, caged or mummified with a decent enough view to see the other activities which went on in my dungeon environment.

Thankfully, all the visitors I received that day were eager to have an audience or be the audience.

He was treated to some sensual violet wand play, claw play, rope play, gentle CBT, and even a little impact play, He watched as I played with and brutally tied up (in shibari) a sexy and slim long-haired brunette, he enjoyed a dose of forniphilia and played the part of my throne for a while, and come the end of the evening he was even treated to another kinbaku show (this time it was myself being tied up by my Benjamin). In my opinion; a pleasant way to end such an active day.

A few days later I received an email from him, thanking me and letting me know how much fun he had.

I am looking forward to more days like this.

 

Do unto others?

One of the things which I pride myself on is the fact that every BDSM activity that I partake in, everything that I inflict on others, is something that I have personally experienced the sensation of (with the exception of the obvious, e.g. penile sounding).

I have been canned, flogged, spanked, paddled, whipped, cut, electrocuted, tortured, skewered, burned, bloodied… The list is quite extensive.

My point is that, regardless of how sadistic I may be feeling at any given moment, I would never put anyone through something which I am not willing to go through myself (even briefly, just to see what it feels like).

In fact, it is through diverse experimentation like this that I have figured out that:

  • I have a sliver of masochism. However, I am not truly masochistic (I do not derive physical pleasure or relief from pain, however I do understand it and I do consider it a bit fun on occasion if the mood and setting is complimentary, e.g. Touching nipple to nipple when using a violet wand body contact pad with the setting turned on full so you have the effect of sparks or lightning passing between the nipples).
  • I am incredibly sadistic (I derive physical and intellectual pleasure from inflicting pain and suffering on others. I have also discovered that part of what makes me better at inflicting pain is the fact that I study human anatomy/biology and that I personally experience and research each activity).
  • I am naturally and instinctively far more dominant than submissive (I am also in the firm belief, through years of sociological D/s experiences and encounters, that everyone has at least a little of both in them; despite some Dominants claiming that they are 100% “everyone on the planet should kneel before me” dominant).

Call it an ethical judgement or personal morality if you like, but my main question is: Why is it that I do not see or hear more peoples stories of experiencing things themselves before inflicting things on others? Has that Dominant in the corner of the club experienced what they are putting that submissive through? Or am I, yet again, part of the minority in that I practice what I preach and inflict?

Responses to this post would be greatly appreciated. I am incredibly curious to know of other peoples stories and opinions on this matter.

A Velvet Thought – Mistresses Musings: It’s only a little death.

A single dark rose is given to me on valentines day every year by my partner and I always think it looks far prettier after a month or two of desiccation than it does on the day it is given.

They are always kept until replaced the following year. But I find that they are at their most interesting and beautiful after a little death has been applied.

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The Imperfect Dominants’ Charter

It is rare that I wish to share other peoples writing on my blog, but I felt this was well written, refreshing, perfectly said and incredibly true.
Every Dominant will hit one or more of these bullets at some point and, of course, they are similar or mirrored for a submissive.
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  • I will fuck up, more than once. On at least one of those occasions, you will suffer because of it.
  • I will not always be good enough, or strong enough, or wise enough.
  • I won’t treat you as you deserve to be treated all the time. I will have bad days and that will affect how I am with you.
  • I will give in to my emotions sometimes, and you will see me in a light that you may not want to as a result.
  • Sometimes, the dynamic that we have worked so hard to create will be the last thing on Earth I want to think about.
  • I will misread you, and misunderstand you.
  • I won’t always know what you are feeling, even if you tell me. My responses to that will be incorrect, and will make things worse.
  • My life will get in the way of our relationship, and what we want from each other. I will not always handle this as well as I could.
  • I will depend on you, and I will need you to guide me sometimes.
  • I will ask you to make decisions when you want me to make them, because I am not able to do so at that time.
  • I will not always give you as much attention as you need. And I won’t realise that I have done this.
  • I will lose my patience with you sometimes.
  • I will not always be able to give you what you want, now or in the future.
  • I will suffer from jealousy and insecurity. And you will suffer from my jealousy and insecurity in turn.
  • I will not always deserve you, nor understand what you see in me.
  • Just as you crave my attention, sometimes I will crave for you to leave me alone.
  • I will not always communicate with you as well as I should. I will want to keep things to myself that I shouldn’t, and some of the things I do share with you, I will do so in an unhelpful way.
  • There will be times when I am happy when you aren’t, and resent that you don’t match my mood. There will be times when I am unhappy when you aren’t, and resent that you don’t match my mood.
  • I will feel guilty about what you give me, and inadequate about what I give to you.
  • I won’t always like you, nor you always like me.
  • We will argue and disagree, and we won’t always handle this like adults.
  • I will forget things, important things that matter to you, and will need to be reminded of them.
  • I will struggle with my own rules.
  • I will sometimes be unable to take control of myself, let alone another.
  • I will sometimes resent the responsibility our relationship places on me.

But most importantly:

  • I will accept that while neither of us want any of the above to happen, sooner or later it will. And while I will always be at my best when trying to be the perfect Dominant, I will get closest to that by accepting that I am not.
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Posted with permission of the author: x_Cleric_x

Event review: BOUND Rope jam

Many of the events that Benjamin and I go to are organised by friends of ours and many people have been asking as of late what these events are like and if they are fun to attend.

I try my hardest to avoid events which I think I may dislike or which I have attended in the past and found wanting, and many of the events we do go to are usually because we have been invited or because we have a Kabunza trade stand. But to make things easier and to help those who wish to know, I have decided to write up a few reviews of some of the events which we tend to frequent regularly simply because it is a damn good night out.

I am going to start with Benjamin’s favorite: BOUND Rope jam at The Flying Dutchman in London.

This is a fantastic night out created by Esinem, Nina Russ & Gorgone in collaboration with The Flying Dutchman in Camberwell, London.

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A heady mix of Shibari demonstrations, tutorials, shows and socializing. If you enjoy rope bondage then it is simply a must to see.

Set in a small venue of a local historic London pub, whose mission is to promote difference, diversity, and the arts. Not only will you see live stage performances of full suspension rope bondage by some of the most world-wide recognized rope artists and models, but there is also ample space for those who attend to have a little bit of rope time themselves.

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From the minute you walk through the door, you are surrounded by people who know what they are doing when it comes to rope bondage; from the traditional Japanese styles to our own western adapted forms.

Even if you are simply curious about rope bondage or attempting to learn yourself, it is a great place for inspiration and the people who attend are open and friendly.

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The stage performances are of such a high caliber that I believe it is highly unlikely that you would get to see live rope art like this on a monthly basis anywhere else in the UK.

The event is held on the last Friday of every month, the night starts at 7pm and performances go on throughout the evening until 1am. Ticket prices range from: Early bird tickets: £5 (limited availability), Advance tickets: £15, On the door entrance: £20.

Some of the performers travel from as far as Tokyo to perform their talents, so as night-out’s go, BOUND is exceptional value for money.

This is not a large profit event and is run by local rope enthusiasts who put a lot of hard work and heart into making an evening which is entertaining and can be enjoyed by anyone of a like-minded interest, which is just one more thing that makes this event special.

Benjamin and I would highly recommend attending to anyone who has the inclination. It is simply a marvelous night out.

Photography used with the permission of http://bounduk.net/