Product review: Uberkinky Clone A Pussy Chocolate Kit

I must admit that I have been putting this review off for a little while now, mainly because I have been experimenting with ideas for the pussy mould.

Normally, I do not go for the novelty factor items that you can get from most sexually orientated shops but when presented with a list of items to review from my friend at Uberkinky, this item seemed to jump out at me.

It was just one of those days where I fancied a bit of chocolate, I guess.

And the Uberkinky Clone A Pussy Chocolate Kit seemed like a fine chance for a bit of fun and chocolate at the same time.

When I opted for this item, I was expecting something where you would literally dunk your privates in a quick setting chocolate in an effort to create a imprinted “replica” of it (but more likely to have it licked away by a significant other before any mould could ever set). I was wrong. It is a kit to create a gel-like mould of your private parts which is then continually reusable to make a replica of your privates out of anything you like.

But they suggest chocolate, and they even give you enough chocolate to create two replicas for yourself before you start getting inventive.

If properly stored, the mould you create can be used quite a few times before it starts to degrade and you are limited only by your imagination (and finding the things to shove in it). Private part shaped ice cubes (for use in play, obviously) as well as candle wax (for erotically shaped candles and wax play), but you can even fill the mould with liquid rubber to immortalize your nether regions for all time!

You could even make a pussy shaped bar of soap or “pussy on a rope” for that particularly sexy bathing experience, using mouldable glycerine soap (available at most hobby shops). You could place the rope in such a way that it looks like Japanese rope bondage of the privates or, If you wanted to be particularly naughty, you could arrange it so that the rope comes out where the opening of the pussy would normally be.

But I digress, these are all just possibilities that have come to mind from this (literally) fun-filled little novelty. The best ideas will obviously be unique to each individual but this is one of those toys that you can get very inventive with.

One thing I will mention is that the instructions tell you to microwave the chocolate. Do NOT do this! It will ruin the chocolate! Boil some water in a pan and place an empty plastic bowl in the water, then place the chocolate in the bowl and let it melt that way. Trust me, microwaves ruin chocolate.

Incidentally, if you prefer having a clone of male genitalia, Uberkinky also have the Clone a Willy Kit!

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A list of rules for the female submissive. Inspired by actual events (mostly).

Another old file found which was written back when I had a few collared female submissives (approximately 6-7 years ago). New rules were added on a weekly basis. I think it makes for a rather amusing blog post.

Some very fun memories.

Enjoy.

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Rules:
1) I will not carve happy faces in the flogger handles.
2) I will not yell “FIRE!” every time Mistress lights a candle.
3) Funny noises are not ‘that’ funny.
4) I will not slap Mistress with my bra.
5) Punishment is not boring or pointless.
6) I will not call Mistress Dr.Death.
7) I will not put laxatives in the candy bowl before Mistresses D/s party.
8) A burp is not an appropriate response to Mistress.
9) I will not eat all of Mistresses chocolate while she is at work.
10) I will not call Mistress Spud head, Butt head or any kind of head.
11) Mud is not an acceptable side dish for Mistresses dinner.
12) I will not peak out of the blindfold.
13) There is no such thing as “slave immunity”.
14) I will not win an Emmy for my last punishment session.
15) I cannot fire Mistress.
16) I will not scare people who are new to the BDSM scene by telling them that all “real subs” like bullwhips.
17) I will refrain from saying “Hail Satan” when I do not like Mistresses orders.
18) I will not use Mistresses bondage table as a skateboard ramp or as a slide into the pool.
19) I will not attempt to wear Mistresses underwear on my head until it has been removed.
20) Mistresses ARE perfect.