Tease & Cake, Vintage inspired Pin Up Magazine 14/01/14

I told you all that there would eventually be photos of me doing Shibari on my blog!

Late last year (2013), a friend of mine was advertising for models for a Vintage/Retro magazine called ‘Tease and Cake‘ which centers around the 1950’s Pin-Up genre. I sent her a message, which was originally meant as a bit of a jest because I have never really considered myself to be Pin-Up material (despite desperately wanting to be), and essentially asked her if she thought I could be the next Betty Page.

I really never expected to find out that she had been discussing with her team the idea of shooting something along the lines of “A day in the life of a Mistress” with me.

The setting would be around the 1940’s, a retro style, to include a violet wand, rope bondage and to have a “Betty Page” BDSM feel to it. As it turned out (because, seriously, I just can’t seem to pull off the Pin-Up ‘look’ and I have developed an amazing respect for those who can, it is not an easy thing to do), it ended up being an interview and shoot centered around a genuine curiosity on the history of BDSM and how it has changed in the past 60 years along with photos to compliment the article. I also managed to rope-in (literally) another friend of mine (the lovely Emma Yada-yada) who playfully agreed to be my rope model for the day.

The article is titled “Fetish then and now” and here is a few example photos from the shoot, which appear in issue 7 of the magazine and is now available for purchase on the Tease and Cake website. It is an awesome magazine and packed full of retro goodness, but I do not want to give too much away. So, if you want to see and read more (including photos and articles on a host of other glamorous retro lovelies) you will need to head to the links provided and buy a copy!

1011228_10152277188750645_1132913195_n

1621690_10152277206255645_1701300327_n

10153865_518686451574115_489980293_n

You can get your copy of Tease & Cake at : www.teaseandcake.co.uk
Check out the Tease and Cake facebook page at: www.facebook.com/TeaseandCake
And if you fancy having your own Pin-Up photo shoot, check out The Hourglass photography studio at: www.thehourglass.eu

Photos courtesy of The Hourglass.
Photography by Nicole Klein.
All images are copyright © Tease and Cake Ltd

So, you want to be a professional Dominatrix?

I receive regular emails and messages asking me questions on how to go about becoming a professional Dominatrix and I do offer training sessions in my dungeon (phone me for details if you have a specific training in mind). However, there are a certain number of base truths that anyone who aspires to get into this kind of business should know.

  1. This kind of work takes a specific type of mindset and a certain mentality. It is not the kind of thing for the faint of heart and it is not just about wearing some fetish clothing or sounding bossy. Clients will know if you are less than genuine. In my opinion, a decent intellect and a basic knowledge of human anatomy is mandatory, and if you are not naturally dominant or you do not already have an interest in fetish, kink or sadomasochism, then I would highly recommend you give it up as a bad idea before you make yourself look incredibly stupid.
  2. It is not easy work. This job can be very draining emotionally, mentally and physically. I am certain that from the observers point of view, this kind of lifestyle can look incredibly glamorous, fun and exciting. Those who are successful tend to make it look easy. But there is a lot of work to be done both in and out of the dungeon before sessions can take place. Profiles, websites, updates, advertisements, photo shoots, constant correspondence 24/7 with both potential clients and time wasters, references to check, set up before and clean up after each session, travel and any specific arrangements that need to be made beforehand. To say it can get stressful is an understatement.
  3. You get out of it what you put into it. You are directly responsible for any success or failure that you achieve. The energy and money that I invest in developing my business, equipment or skills, directly reflects my success and earnings. Quality brings longevity, knowledge brings respect, investment brings potential and all are required to bring profit. You will also find that this business is very seasonal or fickle. Certain times of the year can be incredibly busy whereas at other times you may not spank a single bottom for weeks. It is a very true barometer of the economy; when the economy is healthy, people feel that they can spend on the luxuries, when the economy is slow, the mortgage is more important than tribute for a Mistress.
  4. You may meet mentally questionable people in this lifestyle and business. Most tend to be very respectful and intelligent, however, you do get a few who look to abuse and take advantage (some are prone to violence). You learn to identify these people fairly quickly, but you must keep your wits in this kind of business and be able to handle yourself both verbally and physically. A lacking in self-confidence or being emotionally sensitive will mean this kind of work will bring you nothing but mental anguish.
  5. This kind of profession can be very hard on relationships. Family, friends or partners; not everyone will agree with your choice of work or lifestyle. This is one of the reasons why the mundane are called mundane, they will never understand. The best you can hope for is that they simply accept. Many people will make assumptions, often negative, about you, your motives or your character. I have also noticed that despite being a lifestyle Dominatrix, even other members of the BDSM scene may take an active dislike to a professional practitioner of BDSM.

These basics by no means cover everything and I am sure other professionals will have different views. They are just a few personal observations which I have learned in my years as a lifestyle Dominatrix as well as my years in the professional business and I am simply relaying to those who have been seeking my advice or to any who may seek it in the future.

I would not recommend seeking advice on practicing professional BDSM from anyone other than those who have experience practicing professional BDSM (you may be able to learn skills from those who frequent the BDSM scene, but you will not learn the finer details of how to run your business from anyone other than those who have hands on knowledge, no pun intended).

It is unlikely that this will be my last ‘advice post’. Some of my previous blog posts which have been written with the intention of giving help advice to the aspiring professional Dominatrix include:

Preventing “bounce”

Tipping the hourglass

My only hope is that this helps people to decide and accept the consequences of their own life choices.