A steady hand.

The sound was like running a wet finger over the rim of a crystal wine glass. A steady, single toned hum cutting through the dungeons background music. A Bakes Rosebud Dilator being stroked up the shaft with a moist disinfectant towel. I have come to appreciate the soft echos they make.

I am always meticulous about hygiene, but when it comes to urethral sounding, I am overly cautious. A single speck of dust can cause infection to set in. Every sounding rod is cleaned thoroughly before and after use. It has become a ritual and part of the play. It aroused him every time. There is something incredibly erotic about being chained to a wall while a scantily clad dominant woman strokes phallic shaped metal rods in front of you. He was erect and eager, watching me slowly clean my toys and waiting with anticipation.

“Number 5 and number 6 Bakes, 7/8mm Hegar, Vibrating UD, Wartenberg wheel”, my thoughts while adhering to the ritual sounded oddly mathematic and the medical instruments being laid out neatly on the small, tissue clothed spanking stool next to where he was restrained made it look like I was preparing to operate on his vital organ. I was taking my time and could smell the trepidation building within him, but the look on my face remained peaceful and serene, like nothing was out of the ordinary.

I gently placed the last of my cleaned tools onto the stool and lined it up neatly with the rest. I was ready to begin.

Turning sharply towards him and grabbing his manhood roughly, I leaned in close to his face with my teeth on show. He inhaled deeply and his body went taut as my claws gently prickled his sensitive skin.

“Mine” I growled through a clenched jaw as I tightened my grip.

His voice broke and shuddered as he nervously released the air in his lungs. “Y-yes Mistress”

Keeping eye contact, I gentled my grip and slid my hand up towards his tip, my fingers cradling the meatus of his penis while my other hand grabbed the 7mm Hegar from the makeshift medical table. His arousal was evident and was oozing pre-ejaculate.

I slid the 7mm Hegar sounding rod into his urethra. After months of practice my hand was expert and precise, I no longer needed my eyes to see what I was doing, I simply felt my way along the tract and his natural fluids supplied the lubricant. A slight twist at the bend of the rod and within seconds it was inside at the full length. His eyes widened at having been penetrated so forcefully, surgically and swiftly. His attempts to lean forward were dulled by the restraints and my relaxed facial expression turned to one of smiling pleasure as I held the rod steady and watched him finally give that shaky exhale that I have grown to expect and enjoy whenever something impacts his system.

The first rod is always the simplest. Easy, quick, pleasurably shocking and it stretches the ducts slightly for more complex play later.  His clear liquid oozed through my fingertips as I held the rod in place and with my unsullied hand I lovingly ran my claws through the hair behind his ear.

It was going to be a long and very pleasurable evening.

And I was just getting started.

Hegar Urethral sounds

Bakes Rosebud Urethral Sounds

8mm Vibrating Urethral Dilator (VUD)

Wartenberg Pin Wheels

All images are Copyright © 2012 AemiliaHawk. All Rights Reserved.

A Velvet Thought – Mistresses Musings: Why writing?

On numerous occasions I have come across wandering souls who have asked me “Why writing?”, “Why do you put stories on your blog?”, “Will you ever write a book?” or “Are the stories on your blog real?”

Everyone perceives things in totally different ways, some see me as a sinner, some see me as a saint, both are accurate depending on perspective, but my aim is not to please the masses. I was once a writer by profession and these days, my blog is my outlet. It is a way for me to express the things which I would likely find difficult to describe by mere talk and, being an extrovert by nature, a way to reach a substantially larger audience.

My writing will always spark upon memories, experiences or ideas that are intimate and personal, but also very real. All my blog stories are inspired by actual events or activities, things I have said or done either at clubs or shows, socialising or in the dungeons (I never mention names with the exception of my own unless I have consent, discretion is paramount). But how each person views my stories makes little difference. Believe them or not, the main reason I write is to spark an emotion, any emotion, to just allow the people who read them to feel, imagine and possibly fantasise.

For me its about having something to give. Something for those Dominants and submissives who find it difficult to make their fantasies a reality or who live vicariously through others. Something to share with those around me and with anyone who is willing to read.

And if it inspires people to visit me. So be it. Maybe they will get their own little story etched into my blackened manuscripts.

Why do you put stories on your blog?:
To inspire.

Are the stories on your blog real?:
Yes, all inspired by actual events or activities.

Will you ever write a book?:
I am already a published writer, but not of any BDSM works. I will think about it.

Why writing?:
Because I want to. I need no other reason.

Angele in action.

As requested: Some recordings of Angele being used.

Both videos are of stimulation to the neck, shoulders, back and spine. Angele was on her minimal setting.

The first video includes the “Single Eye” electrode and the second includes the “Saturation Tube” Electrode.

I know I say this every time that I post anything on my blog that consists of electrical play in any of its forms. But it is uncanny how many idiots are still alive:
“Please remember to play safely. It is not recommended for people who have a pacemaker, ICD or heart conditions to play with electricity.”

For the love of everything kinky, use what little common sense it takes.

These videos have been published with the consent of the recipient receiving my attentions.

Testing Angele.

Vintage or antique violet wands can be incredibly powerful compared to modern models. With this in mind, I felt it necessary to create a video similar to my previous post which demonstrated a modern violet wand: ‘The violet wand – A demonstration‘.

When I have mentioned in previous posts about the ‘arc’ of a violet wand, I have meant the lightning it generates. With my dungeons modern violet wand, there has not been much of an arc. With Angele, however, as you can see, she generates quite a visual lightning effect.

I have over two years experience playing with electricity devices and violet wands, trust me when I say that using a vintage model like Angele on full power will hurt, regardless of where it touches. Hence why I use myself as the subject for demonstration.

Please remember to play safely. It is not recommended for people who have a pacemaker, ICD or heart conditions to play with electricity. Use your common sense.

Enjoy the video.

Nothing but truth.

In attendance to my local munch (Swindon’s friendly munch 18/07/12) I had stirred curiosity in a couple of the younger mundane locals. Casual conversation ensued with a visit to the taverns outside smoking area. As you do (or as most mundane smokers do, probably).

“You have until I finish my cigarette.” I said as I pulled out and lit a jet black slimline Djarum. “Whatever questions you have in mind, I promise you will receive nothing but truth.”

“May I ask some questions too?” The more vocal of the two queried.

“If you must.” I stated as I blew a plume of smoke in the direction of the quiet one. My eyes stayed on him regardless of who spoke for the duration of the conversation. The quiet ones usually end up being the more interesting.

“You are a Mistress?”
“Yes.”
“Could I visit your dungeon?”
“Yes.”
“What would happen if I did?”
“That would depend on my mood.”
“Would it hurt?”
“Probably.”
“Then why would I want to visit?”
“You will know the answer to that question if you ever decide to visit.”
“Why are you being so mysterious?”
“Perhaps you are just asking the wrong questions.”

There was a short pause as both mundanes looked in thought as to what to ask next.

“Any question at all.” I restated as I gestured casually to the quiet one. My cigarette had roughly reached its halfway point and I gently waved it in front of his face for emphasis. “Your time is running out.”

“I am trying to think of how to word it.” The quiet one said as he shifted shyly on the spot.
“Usually the best way to word something is to simply say it.” I stated with an amused smirk.

The vocal one spoke again.

“Your teeth look very sharp”
“Not as sharp as my claws.” I stated as I held up my empty hand so that he could get a decent look. My eyes were still fixed on the silent one and the slightly amused smirk still played at the corner of my mouth.

“Are they real?”
“Yes, though coated with acrylic resin for strength so that they are functional.”
“Functional for what?”
“What do you think?” I stated as I glanced at the vocal one for the first time since the conversation had started. I raised an eyebrow and he smiled with an open mouth. It seemed as though he was attempting to think of a witty retort but one never came. Instead, he looked to the floor, still smiling. “Time is up.” I said as I glanced back to the quiet one and exhaled the last plume of clove scented smoke.

“Why should I trust you?” The quiet one suddenly said as I flicked my cigarette end into the closest ashtray.
“I offer a safe and legal environment, a gentle introduction and everything is consensual.” I said as I passed him my business card and made my way back towards the bar area.

I stopped in the entrance arch and glanced back to see him looking at the number on my card. “Good question.” I stated with a slightly crooked grin.

Introductions: Angele

While I am building quite a collection of equipment, (including items such as floggers, shibari ropes and urethral sounds) only the most special of items get given names. Usually these items hold incredible sentimental value and have been gifted for a very special reason or are of an insanely high quality. These items virtually have a living personality because they are so individual or unique that they require reverence, respect and need to be placed on a pedestal far higher than the standard fare.

To date, Sasha and Tempest are the only items of my arsenal that have been given names and Sasha is quickly becoming known as an individual. Anyone who has met her always refer to her by name instead of simply the item of equipment that she is.

Recently there has been two new additions to my family. Benjamin (uncollared as of yet, but has come further into my circle than anyone has in nearly 7 years) and Angele: A fully functional and refurbished vintage/antique violet wand. (a tribute from Benjamin to mark the occasion, no pun intended)

Benjamin has already been (and will very likely be in the future) in many of my blog posts (past entries include: DV8 Fetish Festival 2012: Overview, Urethral sounding, The best cruelty, 50 Vs 6 and Anything). This blog post, however, is to introduce Angele.

Angele:

An immense amount of thought and research went in to the choice of this item. She was chosen specifically for many reasons, including strength and high frequency output, aesthetic value, uniqueness and age.

She is a vintage/antique Vitalis 1880’s “Les rayons qui guerissent” model, which when translated from French means: “healing rays” (attempting to imagine what they would have produced if they had decided to create a wand to damage instead of heal has been the subject of recent wet dreams).

She has been named Angele (pronounced: “Ahn-jhel”) after the feminine French (equivalent) word for angel (masculine being ‘Ange’).
I thought a French name would be the most appropriate seeing as she was designed and created by a French company and subsequently would have been the country where she was built.

Despite being dated from the 1880’s (the exact year cannot be determined as the last digit of the model year has been worn away due to age), we have assumed that this printed date represents the Vitalis company and not the wand itself. Angele’s previous owner (bound2tease.net) has placed her birthday (date of construction) approximately in the 1930’s (this would make her around 80 years old). We are still researching into the company and model, but any help or information that anyone could give on ‘Angele’ or her creators would be greatly appreciated.

She has been fully restored with a black faux leather exterior and black cotton velvet interior. The original fascia is a kind of agate/marble effect bakelite, giving her an overall style and look that is similar to her new owner: AKA. Gothic Steampunk.

Her arsenal of attachments/electrodes include:

Curved throat electrode:
Usually used on the neck or throat but can be used on anything that is curved. Power rating: Medium to high.

Surface mushroom electrode:
Excellent for general massage. Power rating: Medium.

Saturation tube electrode:
Often used in secondary contact or intense massage. Power rating: High to strong.

Nerve brush electrode:
Designed to stimulate the skin and nerve endings under the skin. Power rating: High to strong.

Single eye electrode:
Originally used on the eyes (but now that we have reached the 21st century, we all know better. The original use of this attachment is now widely regarded as a very bad move. But it makes for a lovely smaller version of the mushroom attachment and works brilliantly on nipples). Power rating: Medium to high.

Spinal electrode:
Two points of contact for the back or spine. Can be very sensual. Power rating: Medium to high.

Comb electrode:
Designed for the hair (not advisable if you use flammable hair products, but safe otherwise) and back of the neck. Very sensual. Power rating: Medium to high.

Prostrate electrode:
Anal probe electrode. Excellent for getting into what would normally be inaccessible areas. Also makes for a good precision pointer. Power rating: Medium to high.

Condenser/Amplifier electrode:
A multipurpose electrode designed to intensify treatment and condense output to a specific area. Power rating: High to strong.

Fulgurator electrode:
Originally used for burning out warts and cauterising. Present day use of this attachment in BDSM play can include electrobranding. A fine wire tip end gives an intense array of sparks. Power rating: Strong to fearsome (It should come as no surprise that this attachment instantly became my favourite electrode).

Body contact pad:
Used for indirect and reverse techniques, where either you or your play partners entire body is electrified and literally becomes the attachment to the wand. Sparks fly from whatever body part you touch with or is touched.

I cannot express in words how perfect, splendid and marvelous she is.
These photos do not do her justice.
I hope to be making movies which will include her in action very soon.

All images are Copyright © 2012 AemiliaHawk. All Rights Reserved.

Dual flogging – A demonstration.

Due to the encouraging feedback from my ‘Gentle flogging – A demonstration’ blog post videos and my recent purchase of a set of dual floggers at the DV8 fetish festival, I decided to abuse my house slave at the House DuCroix and practice on him in front of the video camera.

While I get frequent practice with single floggers, my dual flogger handling is a little rigid and rusty (The festival was my first play with dual floggers in about a year and a half). Nevertheless, I am publishing this video in a hope that it may inspire other Dominants to pick up a pair and play, but also so that I can look back on this and see any improvements in my technique through future videos that I decide to do.

Now that I have a dual set, I plan on practicing frequently.

Enjoy.

These videos have been published with the consent of the recipient receiving my floggers.

Urethral sounding.

Fairly recently, due to a wonderful gift of a Hegar urethral dilator rod set, I have been teaching myself how to incorporate urethral sounding into BDSM play.

This was my first play with such things and I admit to a lack of experience in this area.

However, I can return to my own opinion of the play in a later blog post. For the moment, I thought it would be a pleasant change of scenery if an opinion other than my own went into this blog. So, written by request, this blog post is about the view from the other side of the ‘playground’, from he who was receiving my attentions.

Enjoy.

I am constantly thinking about ways to manipulate play during our sessions. So if i am looking for a darker session I try to come up with polite ways to slightly annoy Mistress. This then turns on her darker side. once done, I know it will be a very intense session which will probably end in some form of punishment.
My last punishment session ended with the cane. In the hands of Mistress Aemilia, a cane is as natural to her as breathing is to me or you. She leaves perfect welts, all in a pretty line down the backside. Mistress classed this as light to medium. But I, on the other hand, was the one who could not sit comfortably for the following week, so I would have to disagree. I am very inspired by her skill though, and would trust only her when it comes to this type of punishment. Mistress Aemilia’s expertise is second to none and, speaking as a submissive, I would recommend never letting an inexperienced person mark you in any way.
This has taught me, only through extensive play, to build and establish complete trust with your Mistress. So it got me thinking about other ways to test myself, and also ways test Mistress.
In a previous session, I mentioned to her about sounding. Mistress replied that it was something she had not tried herself but had watched. I have learned that she is very committed and constantly enjoys perfecting and learning new skills, so I decided to gift her with a Hegar sounding set and hand myself over to be her test bench. I have never tried this before so was curious and it was a good way to show Mistress how I completely trusted her.
The day had arrived and I was due to visit Mistress that evening. I was having second thoughts so I had to come up with a plan to maybe delay the sounding session to another day. I had complete faith in Mistress. but was ‘I’ ready?
A few texts were sent that day but my usual way of changing her mood for play was not working. Either Mistress was in a very good mood or she realised that I was trying my best to get out of it.
The time had come, so I freshly showered and shaved and made my way to visit Mistress. I walked up to the door more nervous than usual, it felt like the very first time we met.
I rang the doorbell, Mistress answered and welcomed me in. Normally we sit and talk for a while, I think this is more for my benefit, maybe to settle nerves? Unless it is a punishment session, then Mistress can usually be found already waiting for you in the dungeon so that you have no chance of talking yourself out of it. This time she politely asked if I would like a glass of water and, in receiving, I was told to go upstairs and ready myself. I was more confused by this as I was still wondering what she had planned for the evening and Mistress was giving away no clues.
I climbed the stairs and entered the red dungeon as this was my instruction. I proceeded to undress and placed my clothes in front of the cage in the corner of the room. I then moved over to the middle of the room and knelt down hands flat on the floor with forehead also touching. This is a position which places you completely vulnerable to her, which I like, but the fact that I cannot see her enter or which items she is carrying in for play is stronger on my mind today. You can only rely on what you hear.
I hear the sound of heels climbing the stairs and then Mistress enters the room. She has gone over to the whipping bench and placed some items down. Okay, as per usual this is quite normal, but in this particular instance I was curious to know what she was carrying. I was very tempted to try to peek out of the corner of my eye but before I had the chance, Mistress started to make her way over to where I was knelt. Mistress ran her claws gently over my back, this is always breath taking but at the same time calming, she walks around me usually full circle, one day I would love to know what she is looking at or inspecting as I can only see the floor and maybe her heels as she walks past my face. Thankfully I have passed inspection again and she orders me to kneel up, facing her. Mistress is stood in front of me wearing her new (and my favourite) steampunk outfit. I forget about what she is planning as my eyes and thoughts are transfixed on her. I am ordered to put ankle restraints on myself and once this is done, I hold my wrists out for Mistress to apply my wrist restraints. There is a slight pause, I am not sure if this is for me to take a few deep breaths or for Mistress to inflict a little more fear into the session. She orders me to go stand with my back to the grid which is fixed firmly to the wall, to which I reply ”yes, Mistress”. I stand up and walk over to it, then stand waiting for my next instruction. She then walks towards me, with total confidence and complete elegance. Her eyes are permanently looking straight at me, she orders me to spread my legs so my ankles can be clipped onto the wall, then my left arm is raised and restrained followed by the right. I am at the complete mercy of her now. Mistress grabs my testicles, leans in and whispers “Mine.” into my ear. As she leans back her fangs are on show and the look in her eyes warn you to do exactly as she says, I become mesmerised. I attentively watch as she seductively walks away, one foot in front of the other, so lady like and very sexy, over to where she had placed her tools for that evening. There sitting proudly in the center: a black leather case of which I knew the contents as I had purchased her that very gift. Mistresses eyes lit up as she unzipped the case and removed the first sounding rod ready for cleaning, watching her meticulously clean each one started to arouse me and I suddenly realised that I had no control over the situation. Down below I was erect and Mistress was in love with her new toys. There would be no stopping her from at least giving her new sounds a test run. I became very nervous as I was just about to have someone who I love dearly insert a metal rod into my penis. It was something I had to trust she would do safely, which I do.
Mistress walked towards me carrying a number two sound which is 3-4mm, her expression was: “lets have some fun”, mine was probably of fear, but a comfortable fear if you know what I mean. She had come over to see if I needed lube, I told her I was having second thoughts, but she looked down and said “he is not”. All I could answer was ”yes, Mistress” as it was evident. She held the sound at the tip of my penis, collecting the pre-cum which was dribbling out, twisting the rod around and picking it up like candyfloss to a stick. It makes for the best natural lubricant. I was focused on her, but Mistress was mesmerised, I think I may of introduced her to something which she may like a little too much. Mistress looked up at me, no words were needed as I knew it was time. She looked back down and then she became totally focused like someone had just flicked a switch on inside her head. I looked down as she was just starting to insert the rod, it slid in halfway very easily and of its own accord, she slowly twisted the rod until it found its natural curve and then it continued on its journey. It was a very intense feeling, almost a slight burning sensation but in a sensual way. The Hegar rods are very slightly curved to match the shape of an erect penis, so Mistress was finding her feet by matching the curve of the rod to the depth inserted. Once it was fully inserted Mistress looked up at me only to see me with my eyes closed. Seconds before I had become completely spaced by the euphoric feeling that I was sensing. Mistress questioned if I was alright as she had sensed my heartbeat raise and my breathing become erratic. I replied ”very much so, Mistress”, it was a feeling that is hard to put into words. I glanced down at the rod fully inserted and Mistress was holding it in while she started to lubricate the next size up, she finished spiraling natural lubricant around the next one before slowly removing the first rod, as it slid back out she sadistically pulled the tip out quickly. My body jolted, Mistress then looked up and grinned at me. This gave the same sensation as an orgasm but without ejaculation. The next rod was inserted, Mistress had become aware that as the rod is being inserted it needs to be slightly twisted as it slides inside. The rod was quickly at its full depth and Mistress said it was the perfect size. She then began to play with the rod, I think this is where her sadistic streak naturally shines through. Slowly she began to slide her fingers down the rod, this is more intense than the insertion itself. A very intense burning sensation is delivered through the penis. Thankfully, I was fastened to the grid, or I would of collapsed to my knees on the floor. I could see now she was grinning, and enjoying it immensely. Mistress’s next trick was to twist the rod, this completely took my breath away.  I closed my eyes and hung on for dear life as I knew this ordeal would continue for quite some time.
You have to remember that this is sometimes difficult for me to recall the exact details as in the session, during the more extreme and sometimes not so sensual parts, I tend to delve into a consciousness which most call ‘spaced’. It is when you are experiencing deep pleasure or pain, you become oblivious to your surroundings and are completely focused on the feeling. I next remember mistress pausing for a while, so I snap out of that spaced feeling and catch my breath again. I look at Mistress Aemilia and she is paused thinking. I am very intrigued but I dare not ask what, as she was in full thought of what she could experiment with next. I should of guessed really, as anyone who knows her well, she has a certain fondness for a machine. I see her walk over and pick up the case from the corner of the room. I could watch her walk around for the entire session as she is exudes female elegance. But in this particular instance it would be bitter sweet. She lays the case down, removes and plugs in the generator and removes the chain with the body contact pad. I watch as she slowly lifts her skirt and her stocking tops are revealed. This is a sight that would make anyone go weak at the knees but I knew what was coming. Mistress slowly inserts the pad into her stocking top, switches the machine on and looks at me with the cutest smile. Oh boy, how looks can be deceiving. She is now in her zone, electrified, and I know that with her slightest touch it will be passed to me. I take a deep breath as she starts the walk towards me, she does not even blink an eye but I start to perspire. ”Now where were we?” she said with an evil grin that I become accustomed to. Firstly, she taps her fingers on my chest, you can hear a crackle and pop sound as the sparks jump from her claws. Mistress lets out a soft breath, this is her pleasure now. Her fingers spark up and down my chest and the smell of ozone is in the air from the electrical charge hitting the skin. Normally she concentrates on nipples or sensitive areas, but today she has a new experiment. Mistress leans over and picks up a sounding rod and says ”I am curious to see if this will amplify the experience for you”. I reply ”Believe me Mistress, I am not curious at all!”, to which I am ignored. Just a tender smile is given back to me. She leans in close with the sounding rod in hand and touches my chest with it. A large spark jumped between it and myself. ”Mmm, I see it does.” she says in that soft voice. I brace myself as I prepare for the event. The sound is ran down my chest to my privates, you could follow the trail as a faint red line appeared on my skin and the smell of ozone was very strong. I saw her start again with the rod in hand, below my testicles the crackling sound was very noticeable from the amplified sounding rod and the expression on Mistresses face was one of Delight. like a child that had just unwrapped a favourite toy at Christmas. I entered my zone of being spaced as she continued to torture my private region with the electrical play. After a few minutes (and me praying for a power cut) she stopped, stood up, leaned in and caressed my neck with her fingers. She whispered in my ear: ”Good boy, tonight has been incredibly entertaining”. Mistress slowly unclipped the restraints and I returned to my knees. I had no energy left to stand. I then thanked Mistress for her pleasure.
This is what I recall of our very first sounding session.
Mistress has the perfect touch and sense of how to keep you right on the edge during play and she has now found this new type of play. It is very intense but at the same time pleasurable. I have been told she has plans for many more sounding sessions, so I may be asked to write again.

Mistress Aemilia Hawk’s Hegar urethral sounding rod set

All images are Copyright © 2012 AemiliaHawk. All Rights Reserved.

Gentle flogging – A demonstration.

Continuing my quest to alleviate a few concerns about BDSM play: A flogging can also be incredibly gentle and feel blissful.

Just the other day I was asked if flogging was painful, to which I replied: “It can be but it does not need to be. It is kind of like a BDSM style massage when done lightly.”

Of course, the sensation one receives is down to the experience of the dominant who is wielding the flogger, their technique, the quality and material of the tool(s) and, of course, how heavy they flog you. It can be incredibly silky or painfully stingy, it is all down to what direction people want to take their play.

This video has been published with the consent of the recipient receiving my flogger.

This flogging starts very gently, but becomes faster and a little harder closer to the end.

Enjoy.

The violet wand – A demonstration.

Many people, when they hear or read about ‘electrical’ play, often think that they will be hooked up to some sort of horrific machine which will zap them, burn them or cause them torrents of pain.

In an effort to alleviate these concerns, I had a friend of mine record some videos of the violet wand which I use in my dungeon and of myself playing with the currents.

Trust me when I say: It may look and sound scary and while it can be turned on high settings to cause limited pain for punishment of sensitive areas, it can also feel incredible and be amazingly sensual on the lower settings.

As you can see from the videos, it is not burning me or shocking me uncomfortably.

Enjoy.

Please remember to play safely. It is not recommended for people who have a pacemaker, ICD or heart conditions to play with electricity. Use your common sense.