Quotations: 2013

Continuing the quotations of the year posts, here is the selection for 2013.

You can see the ‘Quotations 2011’ post: Here
You can see the ‘Quotations 2012’ post: Here

Favorite quotations of the past year (including some that I have not been able or bothered to ‘tweet‘) in a single blog post purely for fun.

As usual, no names will be mentioned (with the exception of my own) and people will be referred to in an anonymous fashion or title. Of course, you will all know who you are from being present when I had said the quote in question. Try also to bear in mind that almost all of these quotes have been said in the heat of the moment and are not meant to offend any readers of my blog.

Enjoy.

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Aemilia Hawk: “You know something is seriously wrong with your karma when you manage to poke yourself in the eye with a duvet while searching for a chainmail earring that somehow managed to get stuck down the back of the living room radiator.”

Aemilia Hawk: “People may not realise this, but I have difficulty navigating certain aspects of daily life. You know, feigning interest in others, not being able to talk about BDSM as much as I want, putting up with everyday mundane stupidity. It is incredibly exhausting.”

Aemilia Hawk: “There is something about forcing a man up against a wall, shackling his arms and legs wide and forcing cold metal rods down his manhood that I find very erotic.”

Aemilia Hawk: “Ribbed for his pleasure.” (In reference to a sounding rod)

Aemilia Hawk: “If you are going to be a smart-ass, first you have to be smart. Otherwise you are just an ass.”

Aemilia Hawk: “You can tell a lot about my mood if you watch my extremities. For example; If my claws are pressed against your throat in a threatening fashion; I am probably annoyed… Or aroused… Or both.”

Aemilia Hawk: “I have made it through the entire morning and only managed to insult two mundanes. I think my people skills are improving.”

Aemilia Hawk: “Quit being so facetious.”
Friend: “I do not know what ‘facetious’ means.”
Aemilia Hawk: “Do you know what ‘Google’ means?”

Aemilia Hawk: “I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off your hips. Please don’t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots.”

Dentist: “You may feel a little discomfort.”
Aemilia Hawk: “I am a sadomasochist, Sir. I think I have a pretty good idea of when something will inevitably ‘hurt like hell’.”

Aemilia Hawk: “You would be surprised at how fast people can run when they hear the crack of a Longeing Whip a few inches behind their head.”

Aemilia Hawk: “Appreciate what you have, because basically; I am awesome.”

Aemilia Hawk: “Pretty Pooky pleasantly pacificates pectorals, pandemian pallesethesia permitting.”

Aemilia Hawk: “Darth Vader hole invader?”

Aemilia Hawk: “Kin chasa du Jedi!”

Aemilia Hawk: “I suddenly have images in my head from the “Queen of the Damned” movie. Except with floggers and more blood.”

Aemilia Hawk: “Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, but set fire to him and he is warm for the rest of his life.”

Aemilia Hawk: “When I was a mundane, I spoke as a mundane, I understood as a mundane, I thought as a mundane: but when I became a kinkster, I put away ‘mundanish’ things.”

Aemilia Hawk: “I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed person!”

Aemilia Hawk: “Must you leave so soon? I was just about to poison the tea.”

Aemilia Hawk: “Clearly you are not yourself today. I noticed the improvement almost immediately.”

Aemilia Hawk: “Is the vegetarian option 100% real vegetarian? Why are you laughing?”

Aemilia Hawk: “Forged in the fires of Mount Kabunza, there were made rings of power! Fashioned with a secret formula now known only to the makers of hitty things, these fabulous rings gave their users untold powers! Originally, there were twenty in all: six for mastery of the female orgasm, five for rule over erection dysfunction, three for dominion over anyone shorter than 1ft (length, not height), two for the conquering of bad breath, one was lost down the back of a radiator and we can’t get it out, two were recalled for factory defects because they tended to short-circuit in the rain, and THE ONE RING… Which didn’t really do anything, but we kinda liked the way it looked. So they are now mass produced for our floggers.”

Aemilia Hawk: “I still get horrible flashbacks of a tall, grey, bearded guy, pointing a cane and what looks like a BD10 violet wand to the heavens and shouting “YOU SHALL NOT FLOG!” at me.”

Aemilia Hawk: “There are onesies in M&S. Society has finally crumbled.”

Aemilia Hawk: “I absolutely did NOT threaten to punch him. I threatened to spank him.”

Aemilia Hawk: “You need to laugh. Everyone does. What is life if you cannot moon it with a wink and a slightly crooked grin?”

Aemilia Hawk: “Don’t fuck with my chi.”

Aemilia Hawk: “I am not saying that you are stupid. I am simply saying that you have extremely bad luck when it comes to thinking.”

Aemilia Hawk: “Of course your opinion matters. Not to me, but I am sure we could find someone suitably empathetic. Have you tried posting it on Facebook?”

Aemilia Hawk: “I would like to apologise in advance for my behavior tonight.”

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Concept & Design: Demonic cloven hoof / knee-high boot hybrid

One of the skills required to be a successful Dominatrix is imagination. Without being able to dream up scenarios, tortures, temptations and other sinful activities, a Dominant would not get very far at all. A moderate to high level of wit is a prerequisite to be competent in this kind of lifestyle or profession.

Even with my business: Kabunza, I dream up concepts and creation ideas on a daily basis to be crafted in our workshop.

Back in 2009, I came up with a design for creating a demonic cloven hoof/knee-high boot hybrid. My aim was to add to my already demonic looking persona by extending these features into my clothing. The majority of my clothing was already custom created and I have always preferred deviating as far from the mundane as possible, so this kind of eccentricity in clothing did not seem odd to me at all. I would still wear these if I could ever find someone to make them for me. I also realise the possible ponyplay applications of such footwear, but that is beside the point.

In 2010 one of my very talented artist friends came to live with me for a while, and it was during the course of her stay that we managed to sit down in front of her computer to create a visual representation of my concept. Her name is Linda Jones (formerly Linda Pitman) of www.sheblackdragon.com.

One night, after many glasses of a rather vulgar sweet brandy, we had the basic concept sketches saved to file (which managed to take up about 6 hours of an evening because of the alcohol fueled, sidetracking anecdotes and titllating conversation). We unsteadily motioned to bed at around 4 in the morning with vows to finish up the artwork on the following day, and sure enough, as expected, the next morning we spent a further 3 hours in front of the computer screen finishing up the design art; such is the pace at which we meandered during the course of the 6 month period that she lived with me.

So, because I have recently stumbled across the design amongst my archived files and photos, and because a lot of heart went into the artwork and concept (as well as a lot of expensive brandy), I have decided to publish the design to blog in the hope that one day someone skilled enough might build me a pair.

I will explain in detail each part of the concept: fitting, materials, design etc. But please be aware that I have never been a shoemaker or cobbler, so while I am fairly certain that the design would work and work well, it may still need tweaking in the material options or physical creation side of things.

The images have been watermarked for copyright but they should not get in the way of showing off the design.

Let us start at the base and work our way up to the finished concept. These two images below show the hoof cast part of the construction. The first is what the hoof cast would look like as the foot is slipped inside it and the second is a cut section showing where the foot fits inside the cast.

Aemilias cool demon boofs (hoof cast) copy

Aemilias cool demon boofs (cut section) copy

Basically what is needed is the base of a standard high heel boot (or shoe) with the heel removed and any material from the ankle upwards removed (an inner shoe). The hoof would be cast around this using acrylics or resin. Support is given to the heel using the same materials and would also create the main bulk of the hoof. The space between the outer hoof and the inner shoe would be filled tightly.

The outer hoof needs to be made from a hard material, but a softer and more comfortable material would be better for filling the gap between the outer hoof and the inner shoe. A silicone rubber or something similar would probably be optimal. It needs to be softer but also durable, heavy and quite solid to avoid the foot moving or rubbing on the inside the hoof. The space between the inner shoe and hoof would need to be filled completely and would likely need to be a tight fitting.

The base of the hoof would need a rubber plate or grip to make sure that when walking on a smooth surface such as concrete or hardwood floor, the wearer would keep their footing. Without any grip a person would end up slipping and tripping all over the place (please see the last image in this blog for a diagram of underneath the hoof and what the grip should look like in my opinion).

As you can see from the cut section image, the hoof resin would support the heel quite solidly when combined with the sole of a high heel. However, should more support be needed then a thin metal plate could be shaped and placed between the hoof resin and inner shoe for a stronger support.

Next we look at the leather sleeve.

Aemilias cool demon boofs (final)

The leather sleeve is essentially the upper part (from ankle to knee) of a standard pair of knee high boots with added leather to accommodate the ankles, the heel and to overlap a small portion of the hooves. This upper boot is sewn/attached directly to the foot opening of the hoof resin, roughly where you can see the dashes in the image signifying stitching. A small overlap of leather is then left to flap over the hoof so that the stitching is hidden. This gives the appearance of the hoof being more realistic.

Aemilias cool demon boofs (inner boof) copy

Like any pair of knee high boots there will be a zip on the inside of the leg for ease of wearing and removing. The laces and buckles have a purely aesthetic value and would have nothing to do with the functioning of the finished item.

In this last image we see the design from a slight angle as well as the underside of the hoof to show off the grip.

Aemilias cool demon boofs (outer 3D)

If anyone can help me in the construction of this item, please let me know as I would be very eager to see my design made real. If you wish to use an image or create this design for your own purposes, in part or in whole, please ask. We will most likely be happy to condone it as long as we are fully aware of where and why.

Design and Concept ©2010 Aemilia Hawk. All rights reserved.
Artwork ©2010 Linda M Jones. All rights reserved.

Quotations: 2012

Continuing the quotations of the year posts, here is the selection for 2012.

You can see the ‘Quotations 2011’ post: Here

Favorite quotations of the past year (including some that I have not been able to ‘tweet‘) in a single blog post purely for fun.

As usual, no names will be mentioned and people will be referred to in an anonymous fashion or title. Of course, you will all know who you are from being present when I had said the quote in question. Try also to bear in mind that almost all of these quotes have been said in the heat of the moment and are not meant to offend any readers of my blog.

Enjoy.

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Menial: “Please Mistress! Flog my back, my backside, anything! just not there! Please!”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Do you realise how much skill it takes to hit a target that small? This is the best practice I have had in years.”

Menial: “Mistress, I love your teeth, please bite me.”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I try to avoid junk food.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “What do you think?”
Friend: “Very nice.”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I am not sure if that is a compliment or an insult.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Where there is a whip, there is a way.”

Menial: “what are your favourite colours, Mistress?”
Mistress Hawk: “Sable, Onyx, Ebony, Coal, Jet, Raven and I sometimes like Black as well.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I am actually very good at appearing as though I am paying attention.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I will not recite the rules, but I expect them to be followed regardless.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “My mother said to me, ‘If you join the armed forces, you’ll be a general; if you become a priest, you’ll end up as the first female Pope. Instead, I became a Dominatrix and wound up here.”
Friend: “Though you would probably get more kinky sex if you were the pope.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Quite cramped. No room to swing a cat. Not that I swing cats. Or eat. Trying to cut down. Cholestero- Uhh, morals. I mean morals.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Even evil genius such as mine needs a day or two off on occasion.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I am not intentionally being funny. I am just instinctively cruel and people think that I am joking.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Politicians: More slippery than catfish in a jar of Vaseline.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “More money is spent on boob jobs and Viagra these days than on Alzheimer’s research. By the year 2040 all the elderly will have perky breasts or stiff erections but no idea why.”

Menial: “For some women it is flowers or chocolates or jewelry, What is the quickest route to your heart, Mistress?
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “You cannot find a rout to what does not exist”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Everyone has an opinion. Mine just matters more.”

Menial: “You know, Mistress, underneath it all, I think you are quite nice.”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Repeat that disgraceful slander and I will make a stew out of your tongue.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “A Mistress is never wrong. Even if they are.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Judging from personal experience, I am fairly certain that ‘pot pourri’ is french for ‘not crisps’.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Everyone fantasises to escape their mundane lives. The difference is that in my line of work, I am the fantasy.”
Friend: “You must get some real perverts.”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “If I am lucky.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Your skull, My urinal.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Be a darling and pop my tinny hymen for me.” (in reference to opening a can of ‘Pussy’ energy drink)

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I dislike watching the news and for good reason. They begin by saying something along the lines of ‘Good morning’ or ‘Good evening’ and then proceed to tell you why it is not.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I did not evolve my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Are you frightened?”
Menial: “Yes.”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Not nearly frightened enough.”
Menial: “Lord of the rings quote?”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “No, common sense when someone as sadistic as myself has you chained to a cross.”

Vanilla/Mundane: “Could I visit your dungeon?”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Yes.”
Vanilla/Mundane: “What would happen if I did?”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “That would depend on my mood.”
Vanilla/Mundane: “Would it hurt?”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Probably.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “You are twisted, perverted and sick. I like you.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I do like to try everything once, and then once again, and then once again, and then once again.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Don’t worry. It only seems kinky the first time.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I always try to provoke offence. It tends to make the mundane more interesting.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Pray that I never make a promise, for I shall always deliver on it.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I do try to quell most of my instincts when in polite society”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Once you get past the evil aura, teeth, claws, demonic nature, unholy eating habits, disgust of the mundane, and other small, often unnoticeable abominable characteristics; I am actually not so bad.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Compassionate? Moi? Disgraceful slander I tell you!”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Given my insatiable passion for hitting things with other things, it seemed appropriate”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Give a financial Dominatrix a flogger and she will demand money from you to have the privilege of passing it to her hand and she will have no clue as to how to use it or have any inclination to do so, of course; this is if you actually manage to meet them in the flesh. Give a professional Dominatrix a flogger and, 9 times out of 10, she will show you how to hit someone with it for money. Give a lifestyle Dominatrix a flogger, preferably someone that has a few years experience, and she will show you how to make it dance.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I hope you realise that I will need to punish you for worshiping a false deity.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I do so love an audience.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Mine.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “He looks so “My little pony” that I would not be surprised if he had a rainbow brand on his backside and ejaculated marshmallows.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Despite public opinion, I am always on my best behavior. It is just unfortunate that my best behavior is often considered quite anti-social towards the mundane.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “For the love of everything kinky, use what little common sense it takes.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Attempting to imagine what they would have produced in the 1930’s if they had decided to create a violet wand to damage instead of heal has been the subject of recent wet dreams.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Do try to avoid cringing when I smile.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Hi ho, hi ho, it’s off to work I go, With a whip and cane to distribute some pain, Hi ho, hi ho-hi ho-hi ho.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “4 teeth surgically removed, 3 of them wisdom. Disappointed. Many told me it was going to be excruciating. Frankly, Kinbaku is more painful.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “This Halloween was incredibly peaceful. Not a single trick or treat’er. When I talked to a neighbor this morning, she said it is because all of the children in the street are scared of the ‘demon lady’ and would not approach my door. I feel like all my years of hard work scaring the crap out of children on Halloween is finally complete.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “You tremble, your nerves betray you and I can smell your scent on the breeze. You are oozing fear!”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “A healthy diet, a nimble body and a kinky mind is beneficial. A sliver of masochism helps substantially.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Personally, I like it rough.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Do something constructive: Cut out your tongue.”

A Velvet Thought – Mistresses Musings: FAQ

Every day I receive phone calls, emails and messages asking me countless questions that all have a single and very simple answer.

Examples:

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Q. How much does it cost to have a professional play session?
A. Read my blog:
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/booking-and-sessions/

Q. What kind of things do you get up to in your dungeon?
A. Read my blog:
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/booking-and-sessions/
or
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/short-stories/

Q. What is the minimum amount of time I can have for a play session?
A. Just read my blog:
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/booking-and-sessions/

Q. What kind of fetishes are you skilled in? Can you do…(insert selected fetish/kink here)
A. For crying out loud! Read my blog!:
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/booking-and-sessions/

Q. Can you teach me how to…(insert selected skill here)
A. Read. My. Blog:
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/2012/08/18/so-you-want-to-be-a-professional-dominatrix/

Q. What do you look like? Could I have a description of you?
A. How did you even manage to get my phone number or email if you had not visited my website or one of my numerous online profiles? All of which have galleries, just like here, ON MY BLOG!:
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/gallery/

Q. What do you mean when you call people ‘mundane’?
A. Mundane, in my case, often refers to the vanilla or boring. However, I am considering expanding it to include people who do not read my blog:
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/2012/05/20/mistresses-meanings/

Q. Do you have a webcam? / Do you do online domination?
A. What is it that is not being understood?:
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/2012/04/19/this-is-not-a-fallacy-i-am-online/

Q. Are you looking for a full time submissive?
A. Take your pick of blog posts:
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/2012/03/16/procuring-perminance/
or
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/2012/10/11/introductions-benjamin/

Q. When and where is your next public event?
A. READ THE DAMN BLOG!:
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/2012/09/26/wheres-mistress/
or
https://aemiliahawk.wordpress.com/events/

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This blog post is, of course, completely superfluous as it will probably not be read by any of the ignoramuses who continue to ask these kinds of questions.

People need to make at least a little effort.

A Velvet Thought – Mistresses Musings: “Demandez, et l’on vous donnera.”

Translation: “Ask, and you shall receive.” (probably)

Anyone who actually takes the time to get to know me a little will probably tell you that I am far from prudish, that I am outgoing, that I am open minded and that I have a relatively pleasant demeanor despite being quite eccentric (I do try to quell most of my instincts when in polite society).

Once you get past the evil aura, teeth, claws, demonic nature, unholy eating habits, disgust of the mundane, and other small, often unnoticeable abominable characteristics; I am actually not so bad.

My point is: I am not adverse to hosting workshops or demos at events, I am not adverse to performing on stage, I am not adverse to doing fun BDSM/fetish orientated things for “good” causes or venues and I am definitely not adverse to giving play demonstrations or play tips to people who meet me and make an effort to talk/chat to me at events (just remember that I am often there with my own submissive and partner or for my own reasons, so do not believe this is an invitation to take up my entire evening). Indeed, I have done all of these things and more/others in the past.

There is simply a small price: You must swallow your fear or aversions, approach me, make an effort to talk to me and request it.

If you do not ask, if you do not make your hopes known to me, you will have no chance at all; because I will rarely, if ever, volunteer.

So, you want to be a professional Dominatrix?

I receive regular emails and messages asking me questions on how to go about becoming a professional Dominatrix and I do offer training sessions in my dungeon (phone me for details if you have a specific training in mind). However, there are a certain number of base truths that anyone who aspires to get into this kind of business should know.

  1. This kind of work takes a specific type of mindset and a certain mentality. It is not the kind of thing for the faint of heart and it is not just about wearing some fetish clothing or sounding bossy. Clients will know if you are less than genuine. In my opinion, a decent intellect and a basic knowledge of human anatomy is mandatory, and if you are not naturally dominant or you do not already have an interest in fetish, kink or sadomasochism, then I would highly recommend you give it up as a bad idea before you make yourself look incredibly stupid.
  2. It is not easy work. This job can be very draining emotionally, mentally and physically. I am certain that from the observers point of view, this kind of lifestyle can look incredibly glamorous, fun and exciting. Those who are successful tend to make it look easy. But there is a lot of work to be done both in and out of the dungeon before sessions can take place. Profiles, websites, updates, advertisements, photo shoots, constant correspondence 24/7 with both potential clients and time wasters, references to check, set up before and clean up after each session, travel and any specific arrangements that need to be made beforehand. To say it can get stressful is an understatement.
  3. You get out of it what you put into it. You are directly responsible for any success or failure that you achieve. The energy and money that I invest in developing my business, equipment or skills, directly reflects my success and earnings. Quality brings longevity, knowledge brings respect, investment brings potential and all are required to bring profit. You will also find that this business is very seasonal or fickle. Certain times of the year can be incredibly busy whereas at other times you may not spank a single bottom for weeks. It is a very true barometer of the economy; when the economy is healthy, people feel that they can spend on the luxuries, when the economy is slow, the mortgage is more important than tribute for a Mistress.
  4. You may meet mentally questionable people in this lifestyle and business. Most tend to be very respectful and intelligent, however, you do get a few who look to abuse and take advantage (some are prone to violence). You learn to identify these people fairly quickly, but you must keep your wits in this kind of business and be able to handle yourself both verbally and physically. A lacking in self-confidence or being emotionally sensitive will mean this kind of work will bring you nothing but mental anguish.
  5. This kind of profession can be very hard on relationships. Family, friends or partners; not everyone will agree with your choice of work or lifestyle. This is one of the reasons why the mundane are called mundane, they will never understand. The best you can hope for is that they simply accept. Many people will make assumptions, often negative, about you, your motives or your character. I have also noticed that despite being a lifestyle Dominatrix, even other members of the BDSM scene may take an active dislike to a professional practitioner of BDSM.

These basics by no means cover everything and I am sure other professionals will have different views. They are just a few personal observations which I have learned in my years as a lifestyle Dominatrix as well as my years in the professional business and I am simply relaying to those who have been seeking my advice or to any who may seek it in the future.

I would not recommend seeking advice on practicing professional BDSM from anyone other than those who have experience practicing professional BDSM (you may be able to learn skills from those who frequent the BDSM scene, but you will not learn the finer details of how to run your business from anyone other than those who have hands on knowledge, no pun intended).

It is unlikely that this will be my last ‘advice post’. Some of my previous blog posts which have been written with the intention of giving help advice to the aspiring professional Dominatrix include:

Preventing “bounce”

Tipping the hourglass

My only hope is that this helps people to decide and accept the consequences of their own life choices.