Product review: Uberkinky Monarch Noir Nipple Clamps

In my time, I have tried many types of nipple clamps as an addition to various forms of play. But my favorite style of clamps to use have always been the Japanese Clover Clamps.

And now I have a black pair!

The Uberkinky Monarch Noir Nipple clamps are almost identical to the standard Japanese clover clamps, but the fact that they are a very suave and gothic looking black with a lovely little black chain attaching the pair together makes them far more pretty to use. Which is a big bonus in my book.

The tips of the clamps are rubber coated with 5 little nodules to assure a decent grip and unlike some clamps that I have seen on the market, these are not adjustable. They essentially bite down as hard as they can from the first moment you use them and the more you flick them or move them around, the more settled and tighter the clamps become.

One thing that I feel a need to point out is that part of the pain and sensitivity that any nipple clamps cause comes from the restriction of the blood flow to the nipples. When they are removed the pain can end up being worse than when they were applied as the blood flows back into the nerves around the previously clamped area and they begin to rage at being squished and deprived of body fluid for so long. It is never a good thing to leave them on for too long.

As an added bonus, If you want some reliable hints and tips on how to use nipple clamps effectively, Uberkinky supply a helpful little guide: http://www.uberkinky.co.uk/essential-guides/nipple-clamps-guides/how-to-use-nipple-clamps.html

When used correctly, nipple clamps can be an exciting and attractive addition to many forms of BDSM play. I highly recommend that everyone has a pair added to their arsenal of toys.

 

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Whip play: A few tips

After a wonderful weekend of rope and whips, it has occurred to me that I have never actually written anything on my blog about whips or whip play.

So let me start with a few tips and safety:

  • They can cause considerable pain and damage. A bullwhip is more than capable of slicing flesh and breaking bone. My first steps into using a whip (about 4 years ago) was closely watched by a friend of mine who already had many years of experience. If possible, try to have someone around you during your practice that knows what they are doing.
  • You need to realise that you are going to whack yourself on the arms, legs, back of the head, neck and shoulders. It goes with the territory until you learn how to control a whip effectively. Even after years of practice; you will still nick yourself on the odd occasion. Get used to it.
  • The cracking sound you hear is the tip of the whip (suprisingly, named ‘the cracker’) traveling at over 1400 feet per second and causing a mini sonic boom as it breaks the sound barrier. It will pick up dirt, grass or gravel from wherever you use it and have a tendency to fling it through the air. DO NOT aim it at people during practice.
  • Including an arm’s reach, a 6 foot whip will travel in a circle covering about 10-12 feet in every direction from you (this means you are in the dead center of a rather large sphere which is full of things to break and people to hit), so be very careful where you swing it. Always be aware of what is behind you as a whip will travel backwards before it goes out in front of you. Also look out for overhanging tree branches and electric cables. Always check for clearance.
  • Anyone can buy a toy but it is never the toy that is dangerous. The only truly dangerous thing about a whip is the person who wields it. Do not be stupid.

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Do unto others?

One of the things which I pride myself on is the fact that every BDSM activity that I partake in, everything that I inflict on others, is something that I have personally experienced the sensation of (with the exception of the obvious, e.g. penile sounding).

I have been canned, flogged, spanked, paddled, whipped, cut, electrocuted, tortured, skewered, burned, bloodied… The list is quite extensive.

My point is that, regardless of how sadistic I may be feeling at any given moment, I would never put anyone through something which I am not willing to go through myself (even briefly, just to see what it feels like).

In fact, it is through diverse experimentation like this that I have figured out that:

  • I have a sliver of masochism. However, I am not truly masochistic (I do not derive physical pleasure or relief from pain, however I do understand it and I do consider it a bit fun on occasion if the mood and setting is complimentary, e.g. Touching nipple to nipple when using a violet wand body contact pad with the setting turned on full so you have the effect of sparks or lightning passing between the nipples).
  • I am incredibly sadistic (I derive physical and intellectual pleasure from inflicting pain and suffering on others. I have also discovered that part of what makes me better at inflicting pain is the fact that I study human anatomy/biology and that I personally experience and research each activity).
  • I am naturally and instinctively far more dominant than submissive (I am also in the firm belief, through years of sociological D/s experiences and encounters, that everyone has at least a little of both in them; despite some Dominants claiming that they are 100% “everyone on the planet should kneel before me” dominant).

Call it an ethical judgement or personal morality if you like, but my main question is: Why is it that I do not see or hear more peoples stories of experiencing things themselves before inflicting things on others? Has that Dominant in the corner of the club experienced what they are putting that submissive through? Or am I, yet again, part of the minority in that I practice what I preach and inflict?

Responses to this post would be greatly appreciated. I am incredibly curious to know of other peoples stories and opinions on this matter.

In true Holmes style

Blunt trauma to the right achilles. Force with the knee to open posture. First point of attack. Two: Quick claw to the left Rhomboid major muscle.  Pain to throw off balance and distract concentration. Three: Right forearm. Force flogger handle into carpus. Direct upwards and forward for optimal flogging stance. Left instinctively follows to retain balance. Four: Pelvic thrust to coccyx. Force forward. Five: Guttural vocalization to right ear. Instill fear.
Summary prognosis: Resistance deterred. Headspace initiated. Optimal stance achieved. Ready for a flogging.

Quotations: 2012

Continuing the quotations of the year posts, here is the selection for 2012.

You can see the ‘Quotations 2011’ post: Here

Favorite quotations of the past year (including some that I have not been able to ‘tweet‘) in a single blog post purely for fun.

As usual, no names will be mentioned and people will be referred to in an anonymous fashion or title. Of course, you will all know who you are from being present when I had said the quote in question. Try also to bear in mind that almost all of these quotes have been said in the heat of the moment and are not meant to offend any readers of my blog.

Enjoy.

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Menial: “Please Mistress! Flog my back, my backside, anything! just not there! Please!”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Do you realise how much skill it takes to hit a target that small? This is the best practice I have had in years.”

Menial: “Mistress, I love your teeth, please bite me.”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I try to avoid junk food.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “What do you think?”
Friend: “Very nice.”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I am not sure if that is a compliment or an insult.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Where there is a whip, there is a way.”

Menial: “what are your favourite colours, Mistress?”
Mistress Hawk: “Sable, Onyx, Ebony, Coal, Jet, Raven and I sometimes like Black as well.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I am actually very good at appearing as though I am paying attention.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I will not recite the rules, but I expect them to be followed regardless.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “My mother said to me, ‘If you join the armed forces, you’ll be a general; if you become a priest, you’ll end up as the first female Pope. Instead, I became a Dominatrix and wound up here.”
Friend: “Though you would probably get more kinky sex if you were the pope.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Quite cramped. No room to swing a cat. Not that I swing cats. Or eat. Trying to cut down. Cholestero- Uhh, morals. I mean morals.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Even evil genius such as mine needs a day or two off on occasion.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I am not intentionally being funny. I am just instinctively cruel and people think that I am joking.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Politicians: More slippery than catfish in a jar of Vaseline.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “More money is spent on boob jobs and Viagra these days than on Alzheimer’s research. By the year 2040 all the elderly will have perky breasts or stiff erections but no idea why.”

Menial: “For some women it is flowers or chocolates or jewelry, What is the quickest route to your heart, Mistress?
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “You cannot find a rout to what does not exist”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Everyone has an opinion. Mine just matters more.”

Menial: “You know, Mistress, underneath it all, I think you are quite nice.”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Repeat that disgraceful slander and I will make a stew out of your tongue.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “A Mistress is never wrong. Even if they are.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Judging from personal experience, I am fairly certain that ‘pot pourri’ is french for ‘not crisps’.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Everyone fantasises to escape their mundane lives. The difference is that in my line of work, I am the fantasy.”
Friend: “You must get some real perverts.”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “If I am lucky.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Your skull, My urinal.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Be a darling and pop my tinny hymen for me.” (in reference to opening a can of ‘Pussy’ energy drink)

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I dislike watching the news and for good reason. They begin by saying something along the lines of ‘Good morning’ or ‘Good evening’ and then proceed to tell you why it is not.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I did not evolve my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Are you frightened?”
Menial: “Yes.”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Not nearly frightened enough.”
Menial: “Lord of the rings quote?”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “No, common sense when someone as sadistic as myself has you chained to a cross.”

Vanilla/Mundane: “Could I visit your dungeon?”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Yes.”
Vanilla/Mundane: “What would happen if I did?”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “That would depend on my mood.”
Vanilla/Mundane: “Would it hurt?”
Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Probably.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “You are twisted, perverted and sick. I like you.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I do like to try everything once, and then once again, and then once again, and then once again.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Don’t worry. It only seems kinky the first time.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I always try to provoke offence. It tends to make the mundane more interesting.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Pray that I never make a promise, for I shall always deliver on it.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I do try to quell most of my instincts when in polite society”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Once you get past the evil aura, teeth, claws, demonic nature, unholy eating habits, disgust of the mundane, and other small, often unnoticeable abominable characteristics; I am actually not so bad.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Compassionate? Moi? Disgraceful slander I tell you!”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Given my insatiable passion for hitting things with other things, it seemed appropriate”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Give a financial Dominatrix a flogger and she will demand money from you to have the privilege of passing it to her hand and she will have no clue as to how to use it or have any inclination to do so, of course; this is if you actually manage to meet them in the flesh. Give a professional Dominatrix a flogger and, 9 times out of 10, she will show you how to hit someone with it for money. Give a lifestyle Dominatrix a flogger, preferably someone that has a few years experience, and she will show you how to make it dance.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I hope you realise that I will need to punish you for worshiping a false deity.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “I do so love an audience.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Mine.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “He looks so “My little pony” that I would not be surprised if he had a rainbow brand on his backside and ejaculated marshmallows.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Despite public opinion, I am always on my best behavior. It is just unfortunate that my best behavior is often considered quite anti-social towards the mundane.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “For the love of everything kinky, use what little common sense it takes.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Attempting to imagine what they would have produced in the 1930’s if they had decided to create a violet wand to damage instead of heal has been the subject of recent wet dreams.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Do try to avoid cringing when I smile.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Hi ho, hi ho, it’s off to work I go, With a whip and cane to distribute some pain, Hi ho, hi ho-hi ho-hi ho.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “4 teeth surgically removed, 3 of them wisdom. Disappointed. Many told me it was going to be excruciating. Frankly, Kinbaku is more painful.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “This Halloween was incredibly peaceful. Not a single trick or treat’er. When I talked to a neighbor this morning, she said it is because all of the children in the street are scared of the ‘demon lady’ and would not approach my door. I feel like all my years of hard work scaring the crap out of children on Halloween is finally complete.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “You tremble, your nerves betray you and I can smell your scent on the breeze. You are oozing fear!”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “A healthy diet, a nimble body and a kinky mind is beneficial. A sliver of masochism helps substantially.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Personally, I like it rough.”

Mistress Aemilia Hawk: “Do something constructive: Cut out your tongue.”

Something beginning with ‘K’

Recently it has been quite a busy time for me and mine. We have attended about 6 events in the past two weeks, hence why there has been such a delay in blog posts.

One form of our play that has lately been taking a large portion of our attention is Kinbaku.

In this post I am going to explain a little about what we go through before, during and after play of this kind. I must stress that these opinions are based solely from our own perspective and experiences.

“Kinbaku, for me, is the only style of rope that is really close to my heart because it is not simply about tying pretty patterns. It is about awakening emotions, senses and arousal. With any other type of rope play; you can tie someone, but with Kinbaku, you must put your heart and soul into it. It’s emotion, it’s connection, it’s control, it’s sensual.” – Benjamin.

Stage 1: Preparation

Before any play can take place, a little preparation is required.

If suspension is going to be played with (which should by no means be done without experience and correct tuition); This equipment needs to be set up, ropes need to be neat and within accessible reach of the playspace (messy ropes can mean play is interrupted with entanglements) and EMT shears (safety scissors) need to be equally accessible.

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“Anybody can tie someone in rope, but the biggest responsibility is being able to tie safely. The ability to read your partners body and signals is paramount. Benjamin can read me so well because of our incredibly close bond, which is reinforced through our other forms of play, but when tying someone for the first time; communication is key.” – Aemilia Hawk.

An aesthetic setting or props (even something as simple as a blanket or mat on the floor) can help set the mood.

Stage 2: Stretching

Stretching is important. It loosens the muscles of the model and lessens the possibility of discomfort or fatigue while in bondage. While the model is stretching, the artist is often going through his/her mind what effects are desired or what is intended to be accomplished during the course of play.

“A healthy diet, a nimble body and a kinky mind is beneficial. A sliver of masochism helps substantially.” – Aemilia Hawk.

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Stage 3: Floor work

The floor work is essentially the start of actual play. Some people prefer a standing start, others prefer seated (of course, each can be utilised for specific or desired effect). The aim of floor work is basically to set the tone and flow of play. It can be violent and rough or soft and sensual depending on the moods and preferences of the play partners (choice of music, if any is used, tends to influence and effect play). This stage is often when all the bondage is applied and readied for suspension, however, sometimes the duration of play can be nothing but floor work and have no suspension at all.

“To me, the floor work is is very important, it is about the closeness, the touch, awakening my partners senses and the choice of how I am going to go about controlling the flow of play. It is building the foundations of the play ahead and even though I am in control, I am sensitive to and guided by Aemilia‘s reactions. It is not about the rope, but how I choose to use the rope. This part of play is what has truly made me fall in love with Kinbaku.” – Benjamin.

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“Personally, I like it rough.” – Aemilia Hawk.

Stage 4: Partial/Full suspension (optional)

If suspension is a desired effect, the rigging is then applied.

WARNING: Partial or full rope suspension should not be attempted without training or tuition and even with such things, it can still be dangerous. Possible injuries can include permanent nerve damage.

“As safety is a prime concern, please be aware that, like so many good things in life, there is always possibility of accidental injury. Rope suspension is undoubtedly edge play and should only be undertaken by those who are physically and mentally up to the challenge. Suspension is safe but not without risk, regardless of proficiency or experience, so is definitely RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink) rather than entirely SSC (Safe Sane and Consensual). The more extreme suspensions require a high degree of fitness and often a reasonable pain threshold, so don’t imagine everyone can do what professional models make look easy!” – Bruce Esinem.

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Stage 5: Suspension transitioning (optional)

Some positions are more uncomfortable than others, every model is different and what some will find easy, others will find incredibly difficult. But regardless of the person, It is a good idea to keep the model moving and a bad idea to keep them suspended for lengthy periods of time. This may be as simple as spinning or gently swinging the model while in suspension or even changing (in part or in whole) the suspension itself.

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Stage 6: Back down to earth

If suspended, it is very important to bring the model back to the floor safely (untying the correct lines in sequence to ensure balance is maintained). Even when the main line is removed and there is no attachments to the suspension point, it is the artists responsibility to keep hold of the model until safely on the ground (light-headedness, euphoric emotions or sensory overload can cause the model to collapse easily).

The untying is just as important as the rest of the play. This is where the artist may decide to change the flow of play to opposite of what has been earlier.

“In my case, this point of play is often when I enjoy the more sensual and soft touch. For me, it is an unveiling of the skin beneath the ropes and I often add small touches to our play; like using the ends of the rope to caress or running the rope over sensitive erogenous zones while untying.” – Benjamin.

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Stage 7: Aftercare

Aftercare is important in any form of BDSM play. Rope bondage is painful (especially suspension), despite how easy a model can sometimes make it look. Aftercare can range from a soft and sensual embrace, applying skin creams to marked areas, gentle kisses and all kinds of affections shown. The list of possible aftercare is limitless and is often unique and personal between the play partners themselves. Aftercare should be just as significant as the play itself.

“I know Aemilia goes through a lot, emotionally and physically, during our rope play. The aftercare is an important way of showing my affection towards her. It is my way of saying thankyou.” – Benjamin.

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“I am not naturally a submissive person, but when the play is ending and I am recovering from the exertion and pain; and he warmly embraces me with a stubbly kiss on the neck, I just melt. I have no idea why. It is a unique sensation.” – Aemilia Hawk.

Or maybe, after all I have written here, it may just be a case of Benjamin having ‘Dirty old man’ syndrome and wanting to fondle me when I am lacking the ability to bite back.

He is nodding, so it must be true.

Photography by Raven Imaging.
All images are Copyright © 2012 AemiliaHawk. All Rights Reserved.

No Champagne.

Written by Benjamin.
Edited by Aemilia Hawk.

A story about one of our play sessions that my Benjamin has been asking me to write for some time. However, lately I have not been in the mood to write short stories. So, I told him to write up the story from his perspective and that I would publish it on the blog after adding to it and editing it.

Enjoy.

It was a Tuesday evening and I made my way to the dungeon for the usual session with my Mistress. I thought it would just be a regular session. I was wrong.

On arriving at the house doorway, I paused slightly in the entryway before ringing the bell. It is very similar to visiting the dentist. There is a clean smell but at the same time, an unnerving sense. Once you step beyond the barred metal door, you give up all rights and you are at the whim of the Mistress to do as she pleases.

I rang the doorbell and waited for the clicking sound of heels which I normally hear as Mistress approaches the door to let me inside. I waited and I listened. I heard no sound this time.

Suddenly the door opened. It was the house slave.

“Good evening, the Mistress is expecting you and is awaiting your arrival upstairs.” he said with a welcoming smile.

I glanced at my watch to double check that I had arrived on time. I was a few minutes early.

“Is everything alright?” I asked as I stepped through to the hallway.

“Everything is fine, the Mistress is waiting for you in the purple room tonight, she demanded that you be sent up as soon as you arrived. Enjoy your evening.”

As I made my way up the thin staircase, I could see the dull glow from the dungeons candles seeping through the curtain door and as I entered, the first thing I saw is Mistress sitting on her Iron throne, smoking a cigarette and looking quite relaxed.

I try my hardest not to show any nerves. She always says that she can smell fear. So far she has never been wrong. But I manage to greet her as normal. There was a short silence as I waited for her reply. The tone of her voice can usually give away some clues as to how heavy the evenings play will be, but this time the words were soft and sensual.

“Come here.”

I approached slowly to stand in front of her and I offered her my usual gift which she accepted gracefully. There was a certain glint in her eye as she placed the gift to one side and in a single word told me to undress.

My nerves kicked in again. Normally I am undressed by the time she enters the dungeon but I turned away and begin to do as I was told.

“Face me. I wish to watch.”

With her watchful gaze upon me, I returned to face her and begin to take off my clothes piece by piece to place neatly in the corner. She smiled as I removed the last item and then gestured to the floor in front of where she sat. A signal of her wish to have me kneel at her feet.

After a few peaceful moments of sensation, Mistress running her claws through my hair and behind my ears, she leaned forward and whispered for me to stand in front of the slanted post, which I did immediately. She followed, but slowly. Standing from her throne and making sure every click of her heel could be savored as she walked towards me.

Normally just my hands and feet are secured, but this time she also secured my waist and made sure my movement would be limited.

“I want you fully secure tonight” She said in her voice like silk. “You will understand why in a few moments.”

I took in a deep breath and tried to think of something to say. I decided that it is probably best to say nothing at all.

Once secure, Mistress walked slowly towards the door, pausing only briefly to turn and smile at me before disappearing out. She returned a minute later carrying a large black box with silver accents. There was no mistaking her vintage violet wand (Angele) which she placed directly next to me on a waist height spanking stool.

My trepidation built as she took her time connecting all of the leads into the machine along with the body contact pad attachment. Then slowly lifting one side of her Steampunk skirt to reveal her left stocking top, she sensually slid the pad inside. For me this was breathtaking to watch, but unexpectedly she then lifted the other side of her ruffled skirt to reveal a small dagger tucked inside the top of her other stocking.

The dagger was tenderly removed and Mistress stood for a few moments before me, watching my expressions intently and caressing the blade tip with her claws. When she is not pressured for time, she likes to take her time, which can be all the more unnerving.

Eventually, she turned to one side and switched on Angele. The machine is not like a modern violet wand which would hum and whirr, Angele rumbles and growls, and had now electrified both my Mistress and the dagger in her hand.

Mistress returned her gaze and looked at me with such tenderness that I became oblivious to what she was about to do. The look in her eyes was one of content and pure confidence as she leaned in close to press the dagger against my chest and hold it still against the skin.

The initial shock of cold steel upon the skin outweighed the electrical discharge. As long as the dagger was pressed firmly and not moved, the electricity would not be felt.

“Now you see why I want you secure” she said softly as her body leaned in close for a few moments to press against mine.

And then it happened; she quickly stepped back and drew the dagger in a diagonal line across the bare of my chest. With the electricity running through it, it had the same sensation as if the knife was burning through the flesh and cutting deeply. A red line appeared in its wake, tracing the daggers branding and you could smell the scent of burning flesh.

Mistress paused and held the knife still, stopping the pain. She then leaned in close, again to press her body against mine before tracing the line she had just drawn across my chest with a claw. She deeply inhaled the scent in the air and a grin of utter pleasure formed on her lips.

“No Champagne” She said in that deceptive soft tone and referring to our normal safe word, revoking the privilege.

So, I took in a deep breath, closed my eyes and tried my best to find my sub space.